They say
“But you let them do it.”
Your response
“You’re right to question the difference. Let’s compare the two decisions against the same standard. If there isn’t a relevant difference, then I need to reconsider whether I’m being consistent.”
01
First, check this
Can you name the objective standard and the relevant difference between the two cases, or have you made inconsistent decisions?
02
Why this works
The employee is not necessarily asking for every personal detail about a colleague. They are asking why two apparently similar situations produced different decisions. The manager should explain the common standard and the relevant difference. If no difference justifies the outcome, confidentiality cannot be used to hide inconsistency.
03
Don’t say
“Their situation is none of your business.”